A Copper Brown Beauty

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What I would love to see women do in 2012: For the sake of your Children, God and the Queen (whichever one you get into)….Get your eyebrow game correct!
There are several things that I love in this picture. (1) Her eyebrows are as close to her own natural as they can be. Only a little underneath the tail end is removed. Taking off too much makes you look like a Drag Queen. A bad one.
(2) STOP…Pls STOP…Oh my GAWD…please Stop….completely coloring in our eyebrows. Who on THIS planet has eyebrows that are one big thick black Groucho Marx line. #soNOTsexy
AND Honey Chile….Leave the big arches for the STL and Mickey Dees. What is wrong with you???
I would rather see a woman whose eyebrows are undone (like mine most of the time) than somebody who looks like Pennywise the Clown. *see the movie ‘IT’.  Reference: Stephen King  
Finally…I love black mascara and liner. That’s just how I roll…3 coats of the blackest black that I can find. My lashes are long so I can do that. Be careful with your liner. If you are not sure what you’re doing, take it slow. Practice does make perfect. I love this woman’s eye..even with the falsies. 
Until next time…loving ya’ll for real.

What I would love to see women do in 2012: For the sake of your Children, God and the Queen (whichever one you get into)….Get your eyebrow game correct!

There are several things that I love in this picture. (1) Her eyebrows are as close to her own natural as they can be. Only a little underneath the tail end is removed. Taking off too much makes you look like a Drag Queen. A bad one.

(2) STOP…Pls STOP…Oh my GAWD…please Stop….completely coloring in our eyebrows. Who on THIS planet has eyebrows that are one big thick black Groucho Marx line. #soNOTsexy

AND Honey Chile….Leave the big arches for the STL and Mickey Dees. What is wrong with you???

I would rather see a woman whose eyebrows are undone (like mine most of the time) than somebody who looks like Pennywise the Clown. *see the movie ‘IT’.  Reference: Stephen King  

Finally…I love black mascara and liner. That’s just how I roll…3 coats of the blackest black that I can find. My lashes are long so I can do that. Be careful with your liner. If you are not sure what you’re doing, take it slow. Practice does make perfect. I love this woman’s eye..even with the falsies.

Until next time…loving ya’ll for real.

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Uncensored You : A new year’s wish for a lifetime

 

Do you know what I want you to do for 2012? Stop hiding and get real. Stop hiding from the world who you really are. Stop hiding from the world what you like to read, drink, eat, wear, and do. Stop hiding from the world what you think…about anything or anyone. Stop hiding from the world who and how you love. Stop hiding from the world all of intricate and sometime eccentric things that make up the complete and whole YOU.

 

And Get Real…I mean really real. Get real about who you are and more importantly who you “ain’t’. Get real about what you want to do. Get real about what you need to do. And for the love of Chocolate, God, Your Mama ….DO IT! It’s time to get real about your health, your kids, your education, your occupation, your spirituality, your sexuality, and any other ‘alities’ that you need to deal with. Get real about keeping it real vs being tactless and rude. *so NOT the same thing* Most importantly get real about You…because the real you is not always the one at work, the one at the grocery store or the one at your Nana’s house on the holidays. The real you is the one when nobody’s watching and THAT’S the you for 20-1-2.

 

If I see one more woman/man compromise who she/he is for the sake of popularity or to just get some damn attention…he/she is going to get it from me. I am talking about GROWN women and men. It’s time out for this garbage. It’s later than you think. Make a decision. Make a choice. Grow up and LIVE.

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Next

Over 10 years ago, I made what I thought was a decision to simplify my life.  I was wearing chin length hair and after many years of perms, weaves, blow dryers and hot combs, I was done.  Instead of gradually stepping down, I decided to bite the bullet and just get rid of all of my hair (to about 1/2 inch).  At first, I didn’t think of it as going natural but as going low maintenance.  I was finally free!  

The good thing about going natural is the freedom.  The bad thing about going natural is the freedom.  Just as you feel free to finally embrace your true self, other folks feel free to supply you with their commentary on your new style.  Folks just have a need to let you know what they think about your decision. No, you didn’t ask and you probably don’t give a rats ____what they think but……

I have had inquiries regarding my sexuality.  My sanity has been questioned and various bible verses were  misquoted and misused  in reference to my very very short hair.  After many months of having a constant Q & A session on what I thought was my right as a woman to do, folks finally shut the blank up and found something (or somebody) else to talk about.   

 Now here I go again.  It’s bad enough to some folks that I have been rockin this ‘boy cut’ (as they call it).  NOW I’m starting to loc my hair.   Can you believe that a seemingly intelligent black woman would actually say to me ‘why do you want to walk around with that n***-do?’ WTH??? I even had a young woman beg me not to do it as if something tragic was going to happen to  her if I loc’d my hair.  

Why are we so afraid of anything that displays us as part of the African Diaspora? What is is about nappy hair that send seemingly sane black women into such fits of ignorance.  Are we really that insecure? Do we really dislike ourselves that much?  

Nevertheless, here I go off on my new adventure.  Because of course, that’s what it is….MY adventure.  (pray for me! wait a minute…naw…pray for them. lol) 

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In Search Of

When I look back on my college days, I find some of my fondest memories.  My whole life was ahead of me and I was full of hope and promise.  I believed that I could do ANYTHING.  I was Superwoman, Wonder Woman , and Chaka Khan. I was every woman and it was all in me.  I had a whole list of things that I was going to do, places that I was going to see and the ever popular list of all of my future husband’s attributes.  I was an unstoppable force with the bright light of infinite possibilities.

What happened to this girl/woman/super hero?  Life and all of it’s complexities.  Oh, I’ve done a few things, seen a few places and the list for my man….well after I realized that only Jesus himself could be all the things that I had on that doggone list…I paired it down. No, I’m not saying that I am deciding to settle.  I just decided that if I wanted a man, I’d better get real about the frailties of being human. 

I don’t miss the insecurities of that woman/child but I do miss that bright light.  Every now and then when I take out some old pics and look at my beaming smile so full of promises and possibilities, I long for her spirit.

I’m on a quest to find what I seemed to have lost and when I find it this time, I’m holding on tight with both hands. 

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The Beholding Eye

Always remember that true beauty comes from within — from within bottles, jars, compacts, and tubes.” Peter’s Almanac

 

The practice of getting (and preserving) beauty is big business not just in America but globally.  There’s a potion, lotion, cream or gel for every wrinkle, pimple, spot, line or crease.  A woman can be smoothed, exfoliated, primed, matted and glossed…most of the time all in the same jar. And this is just for the face!

There is so much pressure on women to be born beautiful, grow up pretty and maintain that same illusion of the absolute gorgeous throughout life.  Even though we get older (while kicking and screaming against the inevitability of aging)  we MUST do it gracefully. 

So here I am standing in the bathroom mirror feeling anxious because there’s a pimple on my face. Adult acne is conspiring against me.  It’s already bad enough with this damn grey hair. Please don’t ask me where.  Some places Miss Clairol just ain’t meant to go.  (Trust me, I’ve thought about trying it)  On top of all of that, there is the ever expanding waist line, stomach and hips that just seem immune to any amount of exercise.  Weight that’s up and down, round and round like some carnival ride that you just KNOW that you are going to be sick from riding. 

My Grandmother always tells me that it’s alright getting older, it’s just damn inconvenient.  Of course, media bombards us with images of beauty that are far fetching, false and down right impossible to maintain.  It can even teach our little girls that being rail thin to the point of starvation will make you happy or better yet, the next big star.  We need to stop allowing these marketers with their airbrushed images tell our little girls what pretty is.  I, for one would like to see a whole lot more transparency in the media so at least one less little girl can stop looking in the mirror with tears in her eyes wishing that she was pretty like ____________.   

I thought that after age 40, I would be over this by now.  A pimple is on my chin and at midnight I’m still obsessing about it.  Staring at it brings me to my un-kept eyebrows, moles, freckles and now I’m starting to notice some dark circles under my eyes.  Damn….it’s just a matter of time before my eyes are traveling south and I’m looking at my stomach, my hips, some stretch marks and finally stopping at my water retaining ankles. 

 

Yes, there are things that we can do like exercise, eating a healthy diet and maintaining a good sleep schedule. We can develop a good skin cleansing regimen and stick to it.  We can learn to love our hair and take care of it.  We can get rid of foods, people and situations that cause us a great deal of stress.  We can learn to laugh and cut ourselves some slack.   But more importantly, we can teach our daughters and ourselves about what it means to be truly beautiful.